YOU HAVE TWO COWS

Jan posted about political comparisons using two cows, it seems to me a good way to explain many things.

“I have nothing to declare but my two cows.”
~ Oscar Wilde

“I have what???”
~ Captain Oblivious

YOU HAVE TWO COWS is the philisophical truth of the entire world.:

Moo*(sin(CowA)+cos(CowB))=2xCows

This mathematical proof can also be written with the second moometric identity:
log/moo(CowA)+log/moo(CowB)=log/2Cow(Moo)
Where Moo is the universal moometric constant.

A long-standing tradition of mathematics has been the discovery of new truths pertaining to two-cow ownership. Currently, 45,893 two-cow truths are known Nostradamas demonstrated in 1555 that the total number of two-cow truths is infinite.

A related but much more difficult problem is the identification of philosophical truths involving the ownership of three cows. An infinite number of these is also expected to exist, although this is unproven. To date, very few three-cow truths are known to exist, all of which have yet to be proven. In coming years this problem is expected to become much more important, as Microsoft has announced that the next version of Windows will require users to have three cows, or, alternatively, two overmilked ones. Linux however only needs a pint of milk, but you need to deliver the milk through the command prompt with the use of four pipes, an awk and a sed.

The following are TWO COW examples to explain

World of Warcraft
Bigbeef: WTS [Two Cows], 20g. /w me
Arkarian: lol, n00b, [Two Cows] is quest item, so soulbound, rofl.
Arkarian: lol, some guy tried to sell [Two Cows]
Somedutchguy: hahaha, what a n00b.
Bigbeef: WTS [Two Cows], 20g. /w me.

World of Warcraft (2)
[1. The Barrens] [Random]: Chuck Norris's two cows cure cancer, too bad he never milks them.
[1. The Barrens] [Sefirof]: Chuck Norris jokes are ghey.
[1. The Barrens] [Siefer]: Bruce Lee > Chuck Norris
[1. The Barrens] [Fujin]: NOTICE: Chuck Norris jokes are SO old, Thomas Jefferson heard one from Benjamin Franklin while he was writing the declaration of Independence and said "OMG Ben those are SO old!"
[1. The Barrens] [Random]: Chuck Norris does not approve of that horrible Anti-Chuck Norris joke!
[1. The Barrens] [Ryejin]: OMG That joke has ruined all anti-chuck norris jokes now and forefer!
[1. The Barrens] [Renotheturk]: FACT: Chuck Norris got his ass whooped by Jackie Chan!
[1. The Barrens] [Sefirof]: FACT: Jackie Chan is Gay.
[1. The Barrens] [Siefer]: Bruce Lee > Jackie Chan > Chuck Norris
[1. The Barrens] [Ffantasysux]: WARNING: ALL OF THOSE WHO HAVE BUTCHERED THE NAMES OF OUR FAVOURITE FINAL FANTASY CHARACTERS HAVE BEEN REPORTED AND WILL BE GANKED FOR DEFILING SACRED CONTENT WITH STUPID RENAMING CRAP!
[1. The Barrens] [Lyndis]: Final Fantasy Fanbois just got PWNT!
[1. The Barrens] [Nazras]: O RLY?
[1. The Barrens] [Lyndis]: YA RLY!
[1. The Barrens] [Nazras]: NO WAI!
[1. The Barrens] [Ilovecheese]: REPORTED!
[1. The Barrens] [Siefer]: REPORTED!
[1. The Barrens] [Ryejin]: REPORTED!
[1. The Barrens] [Raigin]: REPORTED!
[1. The Barrens] [Renotheturk]: It's okay lern2play.
[1. The Barrens] [Tyemyshoe]: Holy crap, all this started just from a simple "You have Two Cows" Joke?
[1. The Barrens] [Gnomepunter]: That's why you leave /1 whenever you enter.
[4. LocalDefense] [Sefirof]: They left General Chat! Quick! Spam up Local Defense!!
[1. The Barrens] [Winnerall]: Damn my cows are soo n00bish!

World of Warcraft (3)
You have two Tauren. They are both Level 70. For the Horde!!!

World of Warcraft (4)
You had two cows, but the last patch nerfed them so badly you now use a goat.

World of Warcraft (5)
You have two cows. You can't use them yet because they have to go to surgery for seven hours because their spots are too round. Once it is done, you name your cows TeatMagic and Milk247. When you finally go milk them, they have a heart attack. After they get better, you find out they have to do another surgery for ten hours because their spots have become too square. Once it is done, you go milk them again, but another farmer tells you that your cows' names are taken and he doesn't let you milk them again. And you continue paying $15 a month to the place where the cows where born.

World of Warcraft (6)
You have two cows. You accidentally right-click one of them. You now only have one cow

World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade
You have two cows and a barn that can hold 40. But now you have to cut 15 cows because now you can only fit 25 into your barn.

World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade (2)
You had two cows, but now all the Noobs get them so it don't matter what you had before.